DeeLauderdale.com

Just for grins I have google analytics loaded on this site. It’s kind of fun to see the different internet providers and the other weird stats it provides. I’ve never had a very large readership but for some reason the number of people reading the blog has tripled since April 28th. I have no idea why but I am curious. If you’ve started reading the blog since the 28th, would you send me an email to dee.lauderdale@gmail.com and tell me how you found out about the blog?

I’m really looking forward to teaching this Sunday.  Some of my pastor buddies don’t teach anything special and one guy says he’s not even going to acknowledge Mother’s Day. I think that Mothers/Fathers day are still great opportunities to speak to a specific group without anybody feeling left out. I’ve decided to not do a normal talk and instead I’m just going to work through a bunch of verses in Proverbs that deal with motherhood, child behavior, child rearing, how our kids turn out when we follow God’s plan and I’ll finish up talking about the words every mom wants and NEEDS to hear from her family. Josh is even going to bust out a great Bebo Norman song “Where You Are.” One more thing, you do NOT want to miss the sermon intro video, it’s hilarious.

Coach Paul “Bear” Bryant did a commercial for what used to be South Central Bell years ago that is legendary in Alabama. The script was pretty simple, “Have you called your Mama? I sure wish I could call mine.” Don’t forget to call you mama.

Played in a golf tournament yesterday to benefit Youth for Christ. Great organization and this is my third year to play. We didn’t win but we did shoot 10 under, which is pretty good for a bunch of hackers. Our foursome was a blast to spend 4 hours with and that’s not always the case.

I believe a round a golf is one of the best ways to evaluate a guy. You’ll learn more about him in 4 hours on a golf course than 40 hours of interviews. His character, temperament, capacity for being a team player, generosity, servant attitude, all will be exposed on a golf course.

For some reason I’ve learned more about a guy I’ve never met while on a golf course than most other settings.

Plus, I really enjoyed playing BUT I’ve got to either play more and get my game back to decent or stop playing all together because it’s not much fun having no idea where the ball is going.

During my sermon last week I handed out plastic balls that were to represent how people suppress the truths about God (you can listen via iTunes by clicking on the link on the left side of page, sermon is title “No More Excuses” and the balls will make more sense). The take home assignment was to write the name of someone you know that is not a Christian on the ball as a reminder to pray for and pour your life into that person. Sounds good but I had to confess that I do not know anyone who is not a Believer.

I didn’t mean for my life to take this turn. I’m a pastor, a professional Christian and I don’t have even ONE relationship with someone who is not a Christian outside of those who come to our church. That’s sad and unacceptable. That’s why I lead everyone who was in the same condition to join me in praying that God would put at least one non-Christian in my life. I’m not just sitting here in my home office expecting them to ring the door bell, I’m looking at places I can go, clubs I can join, community events I can volunteer for, anything to get me around people.

The thing about praying this prayer is God always answers it. so what about you, how many non-Christians do you know?

The front porch of our house is one of my favorite places on the planet. Especially now that the weather is consistently warm enough to enjoy it. It’s one of those places where my mind tends to wander without staying on one topic for very long, (hmmm, maybe I do have a slight case of ADD).

Here’s what I’m thinking:

• Life is good.
• The three most important women in the world to me are all good.
• I wonder when the next big jump in participation will come at Capstone-Hillcrest?
• A follow up, should I spend as much time as I do thinking about it?
• I went to the driving range yesterday and I’m afraid it re-ignited my love for golf. Could be a long summer.
• Yesterday I helped somebody move and I should NOT be this stiff after only moving 6 pieces. None of them super heavy. My age (43) may have something to with it but the major reason is that I’m just flat out of shape. I can’t seem to find a good schedule for the gym. I’ve tried the whole morning some days and after work on others but it just doesn’t work. The few times I’ve been good about working out was when I did it at the same time every day, it became like any other appointment. I think I may have a found a place close by that opens early enough for me to go back to morning workouts. But I’ve GOT to do something, or 5 year olds will be kicking sand in my face at the beach.
• I really do enjoy talking with people (especially people in our church) who are in crisis. I seldom have any good advice but I’ve found that I can listen.
• People who fail to honor their financial obligations really tick me off.
• I’m heading to California in a few weeks and I’m kind of pumped. Never been that far west and hopefully it won’t fall into the ocean while I’m there.
• You DO NOT want to miss this Sunday. I’ve got bags full of plastic balls and everybody gets one. I’m teaching on Romans 1:18-23, see if you can figure out what I’m doing with the plastic balls.
• I wonder how much it costs to fill up the pickup truck/bass boat rig that just passed my house?

That’s enough for now. Peace.

I just heard the lamest excuse for needing the day off from work: “I’m getting a new tattoo and I’m afraid I’ll mess it up if I come to work.” What the heck is that? But to show you that there’s nothing new under the sun, read what Solomon wrote 3000 years ago about the lame excuses men will use to avoid work:

“The sluggard says, “There is a lion outside!” or, “I will be murdered in the streets!” Proverbs 22:13

Too many men avoid work like a plague. Some will worry about their new tat, others will tell you they are looking for the “right fit” (i hear this one from pastors) or my favorite “Jobs with companies are too confining and demanding. I need bigger challenges”. No, you need to get a flippin’ job!

If you’re single and want to get married I’m going to give you step 1-Thou shalt get a job. Good women don’t marry guys who are content to deliver pizzas for a few hours a day. Especially if you’re 35! Yes, it’s inconvienent to get up before the crack of noon, that’s why they have to pay you money to do it! Yes it’s hard and yes your boss is know-nothing jerk, that’s why they have to pay you money to do it! Work is hard. God told Adam it would be like this:

“And to the man he said,   “Since you listened to your wife and ate from the tree whose fruit I commanded you not to eat the ground is cursed because of you. All your life you will struggle to scratch a living from it. It will grow thorns and thistles for you, though you will eat of its grains. By the sweat of your brow will you have food to eat….” Genesis 3:17-19

Guys, there are no easy jobs. Suck it up and support yourself, your wife, your kids.

I haven’t had a Monday like this one is a looonnnngggg time and I hope it’s a while before I have another one. So far today I’ve lost the only set of keys I have to a truck I’m selling but finally found them (I cannot figure out why I put them where I found them. Must have been a troll).  When I go pick up the truck, the battery was dead and I had to try two different vehicles before I could get it jump started. Then I call to check on the new gas cap I ordered for my wife’s truck and am told they ordered a gasket instead. But the manager says “No problem, we keep gascaps in stock!” So I waited 6 days for nothing. Then I have a senior moment and have to double back to pick it up from the dealership.

But there was a huge bright spot in my day, this note from my wife:

“Sorry your day is so CRAZY!  Don’t let it shake you off task.  After yesterday, I’d say  most anything could happen to try to help you get off task.  You did a wonderful job teaching yesterday.

Hope your day gets better.

LOVE YOU!”

Now that will fire you up! Guys, is there anything better than your wife bragging on you! Can I get a “amen’? Ladies your husband or boyfriend LOVES it when you tell him he did something well. If you want to help your guy out all you have to do say “You did _________________ really well” and I guarantee you’ll see a visible improvement in his mood. Here’s a way to think about-Women worry about their appearance/Men worry about their performance.

BTW, if you’re wondering about what I said in the message yesterday, you can listen to it by clicking on the “podcast” link on the left.

Jury duty is done! I never got picked for a case. Part of me is happy but part of me is kind of bummed. But I did make a great check for serving 3 days:$42.40! Sweet. Means I can afford a full tank of gas. BTW, I’m really getting ticked at gas prices. I’ve never been an anti-big business guy because if there weren’t businesses, most people wouldn’t have a job. I’ve also never gotten into the whole greedy, corporate America sticking it to the little guy. It never made sense that companies would gouge there customers for so much money they couldn’t afford to keep buying their product (although I think car companies were getting close, I mean $55,000 pickups?!) But I’m just about ready to start hugging a tree because of gas prices. Especially when oil companies continue to report record PROFITS not just revenue. Seems to me that if oil prices were the primary factor or other “costs beyond the control” of the oil companies, profits would remain unchanged even as revenues rose.

Anyway, I think we should do the following and the first presidental canidate to add to their platform gets my vote (btw, why does congress throw such softball questions to oil company executives when they’re “getting to the bottom” for the run up in gas prices? but I digress):

• Drill for oil anywhere in the US that has even a hint of oil. I don’t care if it’s the Alaska National Wildlife Refuge or my back yard. We need the oil.
• While we’re drilling REALLY develop alternative energy sources (ethanol, gasohol, etc.). Don’t tell me that it’s impossible to do quickly, we put a man on the moon from scratch in roughly 10 years.
• Tell Saudi Arabia “you’re on our own” the next time a rival kingdom threatens them.
• Call Hugo Chavez’s bluff and see how long he survives when we stop buying Venezuelan oil.
• Seriously invest in mass transit. Get the trains running again. Go with electric trains.
• Crank up the nuclear power. We have dozens of plants literally sitting empty because of a whacko groups.

There, I feel better, don’t you?

OK, it’s not often that I’m both speechless and ready to hit something (or someone) but I am now. There’s a story on foxnews.com about a idiot who’s writing a book that says among other things that Mary was raped by a Roman soldier and Judas did not betray Jesus.

The guy who wrote the book has a history of making great theatrical masterpieces like “Basic Instinct” and “Show Girls” (note dripping sarcasm) and now he’s writing the “historically accurate” account of Jesus that’s he’s wanted to for 20 years. What an idiot!

It’s amazing to me how many people can get a book published that is so lacking in basic content or intellectual rigor. And yes, it does matter that Mary was a virgin. I don’t usually get too worked over stuff like this but for this one really got under my skin.

I tend to overdo stuff and obsess. One example is I’m always looking for the perfect laptop case/briefcase, there’s no telling how many I’ve had. I like the Swissgear one I’ve got now but that doesn’t stop me from looking. Another obsession is trying to find the perfect calendar/schedule system. I’ve tried Palm’s, Blackberry’s, Outlook, Google Calendar and anything else you can think of. Right now I’m using a combination of a Moleskin calendar, cheap spiral notebook to keep notes, ideas, etc, and all of my phone numbers/addresses are on my blackberry. It’s working fairly well but I must confess that I covet a iPhone.

One last obsession is spiritual gift/personality tests. Again, I’ve taken a ton of them but a couple of years ago I took one that was really good. It breaks down your personality into 4 categories; lion, otter, beaver, and golden retriever. If you want to find out specifics go to Leading from Your Strengths.

Anyway, I’m sure there’s some deep dark reason I do these but I really do want to find out what I’m good at so I can focus on that and not waste time. This test was also good because it had a section to help those who work with me figure out how to communicate with me and why I act the way I do. Here’s a few observations from the test:

“Dee enjoys authority, independence and the freedom that goes with his aggressive approach to problem solving.  He is a goal-oriented individual who believes in pulling in others to help him achieve his goals.  He needs people with other strengths on his team.

He has high confidence in himself and may be viewed by some as egotistical.  Dee may be so self-confident that others see him as arrogant.  This confidence may be something others wish they had.

He prefers being a team player, and wants each player to contribute along with him.  He is comfortable in an environment that may be characterized by high pressure and is variety-oriented.

Dee finds it easy to share his opinions on solving work-related problems. Sometimes he may be so opinionated about a
particular problem that he has difficulty letting others participate in the process.  Dee will work long hours until a tough problem is solved.  After it is solved, Dee may become bored with any routine work that follows.

He should realize that at times heneeds to think a project through, beginning to end, before starting the project.
Dee should exhibit more patience and ask questions to make sure that others have understood what he has said.  He tends to influence people by being direct, friendly and results-oriented. His creative and active mind may hinder his ability to communicate to others effectively.  He may present the information in a form that cannot be easily
understood by some people.

He challenges people who volunteer their opinions.  Dee may lose interest in what others are saying if they ramble or don’t speak to the point.  His active mind is already moving ahead.  He may lack the patience to listen and communicate with slower acting people.  He likes people who give him options as compared to their opinions.”

The first time I read that my response was “Ouch” to some of the results. But it was good to know and it’s a good thing to occasionally review so I can continue to lead from my strengths.

Reading through this time I got reminded that I need to stay engaged in all conversations even the other person is not moving along at a pace that I like. To ignore them is rude and I struggle with this.

It’s good to know as much as possible about ourselves but men typically don’t want to know. What do you know about yourself and what steps are you taking to work on the rough edges of your life/personality?

After hours of waiting, I didn’t get chosen for the first trial. Now I have to go back Wednesday for another round. It was a bummer waiting but I did get about 100 pages read of a great, geeky book “Christ-Centered Preaching” by Bryan Chapell. The basic premise of the book is the supremacy (I can’t believe I used that word) of expository preaching. Even if you don’t agree, there is lots of good stuff for any pastor/preacher. Here’s a few of the better quotes:

• “Ultimately, preaching accomplishes its spiritual purposes not because of the skills or the wisdom of a preacher but because of the power of the Scripture proclaimed. Preachers minister with greater zeal, confidence, and freedom when they realize that god has taken from their backs the monkey of spiritual manipulation. God is not relying on the sufficiency of our craft or character to accomplish his purposes.
• “…acting as though our talenst are responsible for spiritual change is like a messenger claiming credit for ending a war because he delivered the peace documents.”
• “We may be mouthing a scriptural idea yet we remain as impersonal as a telephone recording, as superficial as a radio commercial, or a manipulative as con man. The audience does not hear a sermon, they hear a person- they hear you.”
• “…ministers are best advised to select passages that allow them to quit before the congregation does.”

Good stuff for me as I get back in the groove of every week preaching.